The Next Step in My Leadership Journey

Well the big day is quickly approaching... Graduation. On Tuesday, I will graduate from FAU and Phase 1 of the PROPEL Program. I have earned my degree in Ed. Leadership, my Level 1 Certification and have completed LEAD... all the requirements necessary for me to apply for an Assistant Principal position in my district. The Propel Program is a Race to the Top grant funded program that partnered FAU, the state, and my district to redesign leadership training. This program focused on the latest research, real world practical experience and provided specialized training designed to help me work in our district's neediest school... Turn Around Leaders... Change Agents... whatever they want to call the members of my cohort, we were specially selected for this rigorous, intensive program, and on Tuesday, I will walk across the stage to celebrate this milestone... my Graduation!

But my celebration will be short lived, because on August 22 I will be back in school as I begin Phase 2 of the program, and start working on my Level 2 certification (Credentials to be be a Principal). In this next phase, I will spend 30 days between September and December working with a principal in one of our district's struggling schools. I will be assigned a task to help "turn around" the school... I will be expected to develop and implement a plan for increasing student achievement,  parent involvement, recruiting community partnerships, or whatever other challenge the principal wants me to tackle in the time I will be spending in the school. 

This first phase of my training has been intensive, and I look forward to putting it to good use working with students and schools that need someone with the skills that this program has been providing. My fellow cohort members and I eagerly await the opportunity to be someplace where we can make a difference in the lives of the families and students we will work with. I began this blog as a chronicle of my leadership journey, and will continue it as I move into Phase 2 of the training and hopefully after that as I highlight the challenges of being a new leader. 

But until then... I thought  share a picture of the cap I will wear to graduation on Tuesday. My daughter "bedazzled" it for me.

Developing Resiliency

Resiliency... I have thought a lot about this word lately, struggling with challenges that have tested my own resiliency, watching as those that I love endure their own struggles and trying to encourage them to be resilient. However tonight, the word resilient took on a new meaning, because tonight I attended the funeral of someone who found that they were not longer able to be resilient. It was sad, sad for the family, sad for his friends, and sad for those us there to support the family even though we never met the man for whom the funeral was taking place. The minister giving the eulogy reflected on psalms, spoke of the family left grieving, and shared his belief that in times of need we need to turn to a higher power for a source of strength. I listened and wondered how often during the last year as this man suffered he turned to a higher source. I do not mean for this to sound as if I am trying to blast religion, because I know that many people find great strength in their beliefs. Rather, I wonder about those that don't find that strength. I think about my father and reflect on how his faith has been shaken because he cannot understand why has to suffer. Then I wonder why there are those that suffer way more than my father and somehow seem to find a way through it without being shaken... Resiliency? I don't know, but as you have probably figured out from reading previous blogs, whenever I wonder about things, I start doing some research. Perhaps this research was a little more urgent and personal, because I hope that what I learn I can share with the people that I care about, those having their own resiliency tested.

In my research, I came across articles, books, even a few Army training videos. I watch speeches given by various presidents after national tragedies and listened to news videos in which various psychologists gave tips and advice. However, when I came across a video by Dr. Sirols something clicked. What she had to say made sense, real practical advise that I could share- quick and easy tips on ways to help people develop their resiliency. Nothing like a "fast track" mentality for developing a skills that can save your life, but I figure if it can help someone, why not share what I learned which is what I am attempting to do in this blog. So here goes...

3 Ways to help develop resiliency (Dr. Sirols)

1. Mindfulness- Become at peace with yourself through relaxation, meditation, reflection, journaling or whatever you find relaxing. (I guess this blog might serve as my path to mindfulness!!).

2. Live Authentically- Live the life you know you should be living. (Dr. Sirols put it poetically in the video so I will let you listen to her yourself!)

3. Move- Move towards those things that bring meaning, purpose, and joy into your life. So often we are paralyzed by fear. We resist acting because we are afraid that it will not help the situation, but Einstein would call that insanity- doing the same thing and expecting different results. The only way to move forward it start moving, even if we fall back a little, we will never get ahead if we stay in the same spot.

Most importantly... To be resilient we need to be connected and we need to turn away from the negative thinking... why me? 

I am not a psychologist, not a counselor, and not an expert... but what Dr. Sirols said in her video made sense to me. It was consistent with my thinking and my experience. My desire to share this video, comes with a hope that if you are finding yourself in place where your resiliency is being challenged, where you feel that you are being tested, that perhaps you will find this information helpful. The saddest moment in life is when we see those we love lose hope and give up... if this can help someone find a way to fight through the rough times, to bounce back, have faith, believe that things can and will get better, then this blog will have accomplished what I hoped it would... what I hope it will!

The Perfect School

             The professor stood before our class... "You have reflected on your Leadership Mission and Vision" She was right, in fact I have been reflecting on that since I began this program more than a year ago. She then began to engage us in a fantasy trip... "Imaging yourself in the future, you have had a successful career and are finding yourself in your perfect school." With more than 15 tasks and less than 3 weeks before graduation, I didn't not fancy spending the time to engage in a fantasy. But as she later explained describing "Our Future Perfect School" was one of the documents we needed to complete before graduation. So in the midst of finalizing a research proposal, finishing a literature review, creating my mission and vision, I began my fantasy trip to my perfect school and what I found was that it turned out to be more than a fantasy excursion, rather it served as an opportunity to reflect on those things that I would love to build in a school... a school with no budget restraints, with an incredibly positive culture, a school where I can be the kind of leader I would love to be.

As you read about my perfect school in the future, take a minute to consider what kind of school you would create if there were no excuses, what type of relationships would exist there, what would you build?The following was written as if I were writing it 5-10 years in the future.

                                           My Perfect School in the Future

               A few years back, I read an article by Shelley Plock. The article was titled “21 Things That Will Become Obsolete in Education by 2020.” She spoke about how books and desktop computers would be non-existent, and with the explosion of technology taking place at that time; I thought that the article was not only interesting, but also completely possible. I can remember feeling excited about the prospect of leading the kind of change she was describing, the kind of change that was so desperately needed in our district. In those early years, I was so unsure of my ability to lead that change, but since then I have learned that my passion and belief in people was what I really needed to become the change leader that I am today.

             Over the years, I have grown into my role and I am so amazed by how lucky I feel to have ended up in this school with this incredibly dedicated staff. I really never thought that I would be fortunate enough to be in the forefront of leading change initiatives for my district and yet, here I am! The staff at this school is an amazing group of professionals willing to embrace innovation. By creating an environment in which the staff feels staff to try new things, they have become risk-takers and have eagerly embraced opportunities to become change agents. I have always believed that learning is a life long endeavor. That every experience, both good and bad, provides an opportunity to learn a lesson; you simply need to be willing to reflect upon the experience and use it to guide future actions in order to fully grasp the learning potential.  If I claim a main victory as a leader, it is the fact that everyone here; the teachers, staff, students, parents, and even the community members we are involved with have join me in the belief that learning does not stop at our school gates or when the bell rings.

            This united vision of learning that extends beyond the classroom has resulted in our development of a model of collaboration never before seen in this district. This model is one in which students, teachers, parents and members of our community learn together, both in in our school, as well as, in our community. The traditional structure of classrooms does not work for everyone, so sometimes we change that and take learning out of the classroom. Our teachers challenge themselves to do whatever is necessary to improve learning for everyone in our community. When I say community, I do mean the entire community. With our outreach program, students can see how school skills are used in the work force. Parents and partners share their expertise by bring real-world experience into our school and by taking our students out into the real world. Students learn the value of education as they work to enhance not only their own life but also those of others in our community. That is one of the wonderful things that have come out of our model of collaboration and partnerships. Collectively we have created a sense of community for our school, it is in fact the center of learning for not only our students but also their families. Innovative thinking at our school means that our community of learners looks for opportunities to learn and grow together in a multitude of meaningful ways. Math skills are more meaningful when used to calculate the amount of paint that is needed to paint the house of one of our elderly neighbors or the clubhouse at our local park, and the value of becoming involved with the people in our community in a significant way has created a sense of commitment and purpose for our students. Learning is relevant when students see how they can use it to help others; it brings meaning to their lives, and motivates them to work harder. Our teachers have embraced the principals of servant leadership as a means of helping our students and their families learn and grow to their full potential. But I cannot claim full credit for this, in fact, our collective vision has evolved through a process vested in collaboration, and shared leadership.

            Many teacher leaders have stepped up to move us towards becoming more socially conscious, all in an attempt to overcome many of the barriers that our students were facing. Driven by data and informed decision making, my staff is always seeking solutions rather than settling for excuses, and it has been this tenacious pursuit that has propelled us forward to the point that we are seeing learning gains beyond anything that anyone believed possible, everyone that is except for my staff. They have always set high expectations for all our students and have worked to help them achieve those goals.

            Key here is that fact that everyone in our “learning community” believes our students will grow to become productive members of our society. While every student is not destined to become a doctor, lawyer or engineer, everyone in a community plays a role. In our community that means that everyone: the facilities staff, cafeteria workers, clerical staff, paraprofessionals, parents, partners, clergy, everyone, plays a role in mentoring and serving as role models for our students. Each student has an adult that takes a special interest in his or her success, helping guide them, support them, encourage them, and show them the value of education. When students know that there is someone that cares that much about their success, it is empowering. When students see the adults in their world working together towards a common goal, they see the value of that behavior and they emulate it in the behavior. They work harder to make sure that they are not disappointing their teachers and their mentors, and as a result, their level of success has sky rocketed. The added benefit within our organization is that teachers see the value and benefits of the involvement of all these individuals and as a result the staff has developed such strong interpersonal relationships that it has created a united sense of solidarity; a “we are all in this together” mentality. This mentality has propelled individuals to a greater involvement in our school and throughout our community, which in turn creates more commitment. It is a wonderful cycle of involvement and respect.

            I know that many people will look at what we are doing and see us as the exception rather than the rule, but I truly believe that education has to continue to evolve in order to meet the changing demands of our society. As an instructional leader, I see my role as a facilitator of learning. By ensuring that my staff and community stays current with the latest research, by creating an error tolerant environment, my staff and students will feel comfortable being risk-takers. T.S. Elliot said, “Only those who risk going too far can possibly find out how far they can go.” I believe my staff is still figuring out how far we can go, and when we get there it will be incredible! Someday my time at this school will be done, when that day comes I know that the involvement and commitment here will continue so that our students and our community will continue to thrive. I believe that the model for collaboration we have begun is an example of what education can and should be, and that will be my legacy.

What would your perfect school look like... What are you doing to create it... What are we all doing to create it?

           

Personal Mission & Vision

I am nearing the end of the first phase of my leadership journey, that is the completion of my certification and endorsements that will qualify me to serve as an Assistant Principal in my district. The PROPEL Leadership program is a specially designed intensive program focused on training us to be change agents for our district, "Turn Around" leaders. Extensive training in leading change, building culture, learning how to capitalize on short term wins to make long term gains... reframing organizations. 

A year's worth of theories, Meta-analyses, high effect size strategies, Instructional leadership.

Names like: Hattie, Reeves, Marzano, Fullen, Drago-Severson, Northouse, Senge, Collins, Allison, McNulty, Robinson, Boleman, Deal, Whitaker. The Wallace report... the list goes on, and on, and on!

90-90-90 schools, 21st century Learning, Common Core, Florida Principal Leadership Standards

Being asked what we believe, what do we value as leaders, what are our "bone deep beliefs... those things that we would be willing to drop our keys on the desk and walk away if they did not exist...

This blog has been a digital reflection of my learning throughout the last year. Moving forward into Phase 2, I will continue to reflect on the next part of my journey, but for now I want to share one of the last tasks I was ask to do in this phase of the program. Below you will find my Personal Mission and Vision. It expresses those "Bone Deep Beliefs" they have been asking us to consider over the past year and it contains my hope for my future in leadership. Perhaps reading it will inspire some to take the leadership journey, perhaps it will remind others why they already took the journey, and perhaps it will simply give you hope for the future of education... because in the hands of those that I have worked with over the past year, we are committed to making a difference for those students that need us the most.

Good Luck to my fellow Cohort Members... May the passion and promise of the future burn bright in you always!

          My personal “Leadership Mission” focuses on my ability to combine leadership skills, intentions and actions in a way that can enhance the lives of others. But what does this mean? The word leadership conjures up as many meanings as there are individuals considering it’s meaning. It is a complex process; constantly evolving, and when implemented with sincerity and purpose, it has the potential to have a positive, dynamic impact on people. Leadership plays a significant role in the lives of every individual regardless of how it is defined.

            For me Leadership can best be broken down into three separate aspects: Skills, Intentions and Actions. Leadership Skills requires individuals to have both a conceptual understanding and a perceptual understanding. The conceptual understanding might also be called the science of leadership, that is, the knowledge of effective leadership strategies, an understanding of how to motivate individuals, and a familiarity with ways to support adult growth and development. The perceptual understanding might best be described as “soft skills,” that is those people skills necessary for building relational trust, the with-it-ness to respond in the moment, and the ability to “read” your audience so you know when your message is being well received.

            Leadership Intentions are more introspective and reflective. Leadership intentions are about core values, those things that define your character and your personal beliefs. One of my key leadership intentions is to be a life-long learner. I believe that we need to continue to take advance of opportunities to not only grow as individuals through reflective practices but we need to also help others reach their full potential. This type of servant leadership is central to my leadership intentions. I also believe it is important to maintain a professional demeanor, one in which I make ethical decisions, set high expectations, and take personal responsibility for my actions. Integrity, honesty, commitment, and passion are aspects of this professionalism and are essential to my core values.

            Finally, leadership takes action. I believe leaders need to have a strong voice for change. They need to support and encourage creative, innovative thinking by creating an environment in which individuals feel safe to take risks. Leaders need to recruit and maintain partnerships and involve all stakeholders in order to develop a framework for collaboration that will increase opportunities for success. Leadership action means that we seek solutions rather than settling for excuses, facing each challenge head on without allowing them to become barriers. Leadership action means that we set high standards; for ourselves and for everyone we work with. It means that we create the belief that anything worth doing is worth doing well… we find the right way not the easy way, and excellence is an expectation not an exception. When leaders take action, we ensure that everyone understands that they play a role in the success of the organization, their ideas, their input and their effort are required and valued.

            These three leadership aspects combined incorporate my personal values, those things that are of utmost importance to me as a person and as a leader. They make up the core of my personal “Leadership Mission.”

            My personal “vision” takes my mission and places it into the future. The vision manifested as a school leader would focus on my ability to create a framework for collaboration in which all stakeholders can work together to create a school that is central to the community, one in which high expectations lead to student achievement and personal growth. However, my vision for the future does not end as a school leader. I have always believed that my true calling is to impact education on a broader scale. My curriculum knowledge, ability to write, my innovative thinking, and my passion for education extends beyond the scope of a single school or even a single district. My vision for the future places me in a position to impact education at the state or national level. With a strong belief that our system needs to be reformed in a way that we are able to create a landscape where industry and education can come together to enhance opportunities for all students, where learning extends into the real-world, where classrooms no longer exist solely within the confines of a building, and where people of all ages come together to learn; my vision for my future in leadership places me in a position to provide innovative ideas that will change the way we learn for decades to come. 

 

Listen, Learn, Lead... Leading for the Future

I am finishing up my leadership program and this summer I will complete my last three courses, after which I will have earned my degree and all the credentials needed to apply for a position as an Assistant Principal. However, (as has been the case throughout my program) I am still searching for that 'best' way to lead a school and a staff during one of the most challenging times in the history of education in my state; a time with national educational reform focused on college and career readiness, state legislation pushing the boundaries for "Accel"-leration, a new teacher/ administration evaluation framework, and a district strategic plan seeking to address some of the greatest challenges facing our students, especially for our most fragile students. Don't get me wrong, these are all good things for education and for students, but with all of these changes it will require a level of change not seen in our schools for decades. One of my professors in this program, the former deputy superintendent for my district, answered my questions about how we should go about making a cultural change in challenging times with this response: "when you figure out the best way to do that, you should write the next book on reform, it will be a best seller." Intellectually I understand that there is no "right way" to accomplish wide scale change but that doesn't stop me for looking for it.

So when I heard General Stanley McChrystal's TedTalk speech in class on Thursday night, I began to think that he may have the secret that I have been looking for... The title of his speech "Listen, Learn, Lead." In his speech he talked about the need to  develop a shared purpose, about how leaders need to be willing to engage in "reverse mentoring" and what I thought was most significant, was how leaders need to allow people to fail without letting them become failures. His speech caused me to reflect, and as is often the case, this reflection lead me to the blog you are reading now.

This is my take away from the speech... at least my reflection based on my take away.

Listen:

Throughout my program I have carefully listened to those way more knowledgeable than myself. Advice from years of experience and study...

      "If people are not following your procedures or working up to your expectations, its because they are either deficient or defiant. I assume they are deficient and provide training. If they still don't do it they are defiant. So I document them into compliance or out of a job." Words from a very,no nonsense director in my district

       "Remember the three T's: Truth, Trust, and Transparency." From the coordinator of a Charter Program services.

   "You can't do this job alone, you are going to need all the help you can get." My Community Partnerships teacher and a Director in the district.

         "Make sure you have a clear plan in place to manage all operational procedures, so your are proactive instead of reactive. There will be plenty of things that come up that will require you to react, don't add to that by not managing the things you should have already taken care of..." Her least favorite word...Procrastinate! Former Deputy Superintendent.

       "The secret to leadership.... relationships,relationships, relationships." Dr. Smith- Center for Leadership and Learning.

Learn:

Learning is essential as we transition into a new era of educational reform. As a leader I need to not only be a life-long learner myself, I need to encourage those around me to do the same. More importantly perhaps is the need to constantly reflect on my actions, learn from mistakes, be humble enough to admit them, and take action to correct them.

Shared Purpose:

There has never been a time in our history when it was more important for leaders to create a shared sense of purpose. With the diversity that exists in our societies, people bring with them a wide range of experience, as well as, family and cultural influences that create the basis for their perspectives. Unless we can create a shared purpose, our efforts can, at best, be loosely aligned to our priorities and at worse, can be contrary to our priorities. Identifying what is really important to us, all of us, for our children, for our society, for our future is key to establishing a shared purpose.

Reverse Mentorship:

This is an interesting notion that recognizes the fact that as leaders we will have those we lead that have expertise in areas in which we do not. We need to be willing to reach out to those individuals and learn from them, have them share their expertise with our organizations, and celebrate their contributions. Often leaders, especially new leaders, are intimidated by those within our ranks that have skills that we do not have. I need to be willing to embrace opportunities for reverse mentoring.

Allow people to fail without becoming failures:

This was perhaps the most profound of the comments General McChrystal made in his Tedtalk. In order for people to be willing to take risks, the leader has to create an error tolerant environment. People have to trust their leader in order to be willing to take such risks. I have been very lucky to have a mentor in my leadership program that has created such an environment. As a result, I have tried some things that have been incredibly successful, and some things that have not turned out the way I had hoped. My mentor did not allow me to let those failures make me feel like a failure. Instead we used it to help me reflect, some of the greatest growth I have made towards becoming a leader has been the result of these reflections. To me this is perhaps the best lesson my mentor has taught me... I'm not perfect and that is OK!

Today's leaders are going to face challenges never before faced by educational leaders.  If we hope to meet these challenges now and into the future, we need to listen, learn, and lead from the heart, as well as, the head.

Enjoy General Stanley McChrystal's speech for TedTalk.

The Woman in the Mirror

Have you ever stopped to think about mirrors... and all the crazy stories about mirrors? Mirrors are thought to be the doorway to the soul. By looking in a mirror we are able to see our true selves. Some cultures believe mirrors hold mystical powers. Even fairy tales speak of the power mirrors have to reveal truths. And shoud an unfortunate soul break a mirror, look out!. Romans believed that if you broke a mirror you would have 7 years of bad luck because a broken mirror meant a broken soul, and it would take 7 years to restore your soul. Fortunately for the Romans, if they were able to find all the pieces of the mirror and buried them they could undo their bad luck. Others believed that if grind pieces of the broken mirror you could counteract the jinx. Still others claim the only way to rid oneself of bad luck from the broken mirror was to tap the piece on a gravestone.

Jews will cover their mirrors during times of mourning. Some cultures won't hang a mirror in a baby's room for fear that something bad will happen to the child. And there is even an old wives tale that says a woman can see her future husband if she sits in front of a mirror eating an apple before brushing her hair.

I know some of these things are crazy right? But whether you believe in some or all or none, the fact remains that for many of us, mirrors can be something we avoid. I hate those 360 mirrors in dressing rooms, as long as I don't have to see how wide my backside has gotten, I can pretend it still looks like it did 20 years ago... Showing me isn't going to make me want to buy those clothes- it's going to make me want to go on a starvation diet! And whomever invented a magnifying mirror must have been young, no woman wants to look that closely at her wrinkles!

I hate mirrors, looking in them always turns into some type of critical self evaluation. 

From bad hair days, too much gray, things too tight, saggy, baggy, lumpy, bumpy, old... you get the idea. I don't think its just me, because I have seen lots of woman pass a mirror only to pause, look, make a face that at best can be described as a grimance, and walk on wishing they never gazed in the mirror in the first place. So what is about that reflection, why is it that when I look at the woman in the mirror I see all the things I'd like to change? 

I sometimes think I'd be better off not looking, or perhaps I should take the man in my life's advice and "get a new mirror". I wonder, what would I see if I got a new  mirror? Would I see the beautiful strong woman he sees? Would I see a woman that isn't afraid to start new thingsno matter how old she is? would I see a woman that is intelligent, capable, passionate, and determined to make a difference? I do know, thay is the type of woman that I want to see in the mirror, and that woman is me. Perhaps it is time to get a  new mirror, or at least look at myself differently in my old mirror... bad hair days and all!

Visit this site... It inspired the blog, but it's the people I love that inspire me.

Dove Real Beauty Campaign

Looking for rainbows...And that pot of gold!

I remember when I was a kid how excited I would get whenever I would see a rainbow. My father had me convinced that if I could find the end of the rainbow there really would be a pot of gold. He would even drive my brother and I around looking for the rainbows end.Of course we never did find it but that didn't stop me from looking.

As an adult, to this day, whenever I see a rainbow I can remember how we would plot our scheme to catch the leprechaun and it makes me smile. Silly childhood stories associated with a natural phenomenon, but somehow it helps make cloudy days easier as I wait for the rainbow.

So why am I thinking about rainbows? Not because I have seen one recently and not because it's St. Patrick's day, that was over a month ago. I think it's because of what that rainbow and the pot of gold means to me. You see those stories helped me see the magic in ordinary events, they help me believe that a dream worth having was one worth the chase, and that even if you don't find what you were looking for the first time, you never give up trying... because some where out there is your pot of gold waiting to be discovered. Most importantly, is the knowledge that even without the gold, that rainbow is an amazing sight to behold. I am not sure if my father was simply trying to create some memories for his children or to teach us some metaphorical life lesson, but his stories did both. Now at a time when he is facing some difficult challenges, I hope I can help create the same sense of hope for him and determination he instilled in me.

Words from my father all those years ago, 'if you keep searching, someday you will find your treasure.'
My words to you dad... your treasures are all around you keep moving forward so you can enjoy them.

Dedicated to you dad, may you find the physical strength to endure the work, the mental strength to endure the pain, and emotion strength to keep the faith.

A life worth living... Finding meaning and purpose

My life over the past month or so has been at best stressful and at worst ... well I'd prefer to think of it as stressful. Without going into my tale of woes, let's just say i have had to take a good long look at my self, my life, the choices I have made, my priorities and I have had to decide what really matters to me. There is a Jewsh proverb that says something like this, don't ask for a lighter burden but for broader shoulders.' My mom used to tell me the you are nevergiven more than you can handle, only more than you think you can handle. That way when you do handle it, you realize how strong you are.

While my mom may be right, i often find myself wondering why all my 'tests' seem to come at the same time. Frank Clark said 'if you find a path with no obstacles, it probably doesn't lead anywhere.' There is another famous quote that says, 'adversity introduces man to himself.' Well I must say, I have gotten  to know myself very well lately... and what I learned is I don't have to be perfect, and the people I care most about will love me anyway. I have always tried to be strong, to be the one others came to in times of need. I would give my time,energy, money, whatever I had to help others, but when I felt burdened, drained, beat down, I very rarely asked for help. I didn't want to be seen as weak. I wanted to be perfect.

But life has a way of putting things straight whether we want them to be or not. I have always believed that things happen for a reason, so I have been searching for the reason behind the events of the past month or so. It wasn't until I read a recent blogpost of Umair Hague (See blog) that the reason started to become clear to me. In his blog, Hague gives 5 rules for finding reason: Total surrender, absolute clarity, real life, simplicity, and brutal honesty. To truly find meaning and purpose in my life, I need to surrender my notions of who others think I should be or should do, so that I am not saddled with their expectations.To find purpose in my life, i need to stop living a life up to other people's expectations, I need to be authentic to the person I am now, not the person others want me to be. I need to be clear on what I want, what I am willing to do for that and what I am not willing to do. I need to be absolutely clear on my priorities in life, in my career, in my future... my priorities. A life worth living needs to be more simple. I have cluttered my life by allowing other peoples issues to become my issues, i have worried about things and people that i have no control over, and I have given in to the craziness around me, making mountains out of mole hills and making things into more than they need to be. Most important, is I haven't been honest, not with myself and not with people I love. Whether it was fear that I woud disappoint them,my unwillingness to admit my mistakes or that I wasn't perfect, or the fact that I carry a full bag of insecurities... the result has been I have found myself faced with need to be brutally honest.

I often find that Hague's blog seem to speak to me at the moment I need to reflect the most.  This one was no different. My life was being flipped, and yet despite the fact that I was quite unbalanced by the events, I also felt a sense of relief. You see it is EXHAUSTING being perfect, it is more exhausting always putting everyone else's needs before your own. I didn't realize how exhausted I was until I was treated to a little down time. Knowing what a challenging month I have had, a very special man in my life treated me to a mental health weekend. A weekend to recharge, to rest, a weekend with no worries, no demands, no stress, time to unwind and reboot.

It is amazing how much of life's woes can be cleared away by a weekend of pampering. A life worth living, one in which you can find meaning and purpose is a lot easier to figure out after a weekend of stress free living. I highly recommend you try it from time to time. As for my special guy, all I can say is that I feel very lucky to have a man in my life that knows exactly what I need and when I need it.

Life Lessons

  Ralph Waldo Emerson said,  “Life is a succession of lessons which must be lived to be understood.”

          

           My life has definitely been filled with a succession of lessons. There have been times when I pondered the reason why something was happening while in the midst of the experience, and other times when meaning came well after the fact. For some of life lessons, I have questioned why I need to experience them at all, and others I immediate saw the reason. But now, as I reflect on where I have been, the winding road I have traveled to get to the point where I am at now, it is clear that we will always end up in the very spot where we are supposed to be and doing what we are supposed to do.

       I have been very blessed to have had some wonderful people touch my life. People that have enriched my life and given it meaning. Some people I have loved and lost, some people that I shared a moment with, some that I shared years with, and some I hope to spend time with in the future. Each has influenced the person I have become; the daughter, the sister, the mother, the friend, the student, the teacher, the mentor, the leader, and the woman. I am, and will forever be, grateful to each and everyone of these people because I am who I am because of them.
       As I move forward, into the next stages of my life, I bring with me the lessons from the past and hopes for the future; inspiration, motivation, determination, a belief in my ability to make a difference in the lives of others, and perhaps most importantly the knowledge that life and love continue to bring a promise of better things to come.

      Someone very special to me share this with me, and I would like to share it with all of you. As you read it, let it spark a hope in you, and remember to tell those you love how you feel... I hope mine know how I feel about them.

“Only once in your life, I truly believe, you find someone who can completely turn your world around. You tell them things that you’ve never shared with another soul and they absorb everything you say and actually want to hear more. You share hopes for the future, dreams that will never come true, goals that were never achieved and the many disappointments life has thrown at you. When something wonderful happens, you can’t wait to tell them about it, knowing they will share in your excitement. They are not embarrassed to cry with you when you are hurting or laugh with you when you make a fool of yourself. Never do they hurt your feelings or make you feel like you are not good enough, but rather they build you up and show you the things about yourself that make you special and even beautiful. There is never any pressure, jealousy or competition but only a quiet calmness when they are around. You can be yourself and not worry about what they will think of you because they love you for who you are. The things that seem insignificant to most people such as a note, song or walk become invaluable treasures kept safe in your heart to cherish forever. Memories of your childhood come back and are so clear and vivid it’s like being young again. Colors seem brighter and more brilliant. Laughter seems part of daily life where before it was infrequent or didn’t exist at all. A phone call or two during the day helps to get you through a long day’s work and always brings a smile to your face. In their presence, there’s no need for continuous conversation, but you find you’re quite content in just having them nearby. Things that never interested you before become fascinating because you know they are important to this person who is so special to you. You think of this person on every occasion and in everything you do. Simple things bring them to mind like a pale blue sky, gentle wind or even a storm cloud on the horizon. You open your heart knowing that there’s a chance it may be broken one day and in opening your heart, you experience a love and joy that you never dreamed possible. You find that being vulnerable is the only way to allow your heart to feel true pleasure that’s so real it scares you. You find strength in knowing you have a true friend and possibly a soul mate who will remain loyal to the end. Life seems completely different, exciting and worthwhile. Your only hope and security is in knowing that they are a part of your life.”

Semper Fi

What does Educational Leadership and the Marines have in common? Interestingly enough, more than you might think!

Today was the first class of Instructional Leadership 2. This course focuses on developing effective schools and effective teachers. We considered characteristics of an instructional leader in relation to the changing educational expectations that will accompany our transition into Common Core standards.

OK, great,  so what does this have to do with the Marines, you ask? Well it has more to do with the PROPEL Program and the people in my Cohort. Here is an excerpt from my reflection from class, perhaps after reading it you will see the connection.

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        The PROPEL training is much akin to boot camp; we are, in essence, being trained to be the Marines of Education. A Marine’s core values center on honor, courage and commitment; they are elite, noble warriors, specially trained and committed to serve and protect our country. Our PROPEL Cohort share a similar commitment and the same type of bond, a brotherhood of sorts, equally dedicated to serving the youth in our community. “Marine Corps officers embrace the phrase Ductos Exemplo, to lead by example” (Marines.Com). Our PROPEL Cohort also recognize that in order to create change we need to lead by example. Like the Marines Corp, we recognize that desire and motivation is key to our success. In fact, our list of characteristics of an instructional leader included many of these qualities. “Marines are held to a higher standard and are expected to act responsibly in a manner befitting the title they’ve earned.” We too will be held to a higher standard.

            This comparison to the Marines was prompted by my reflection on the most meaningful aspect of today’s learning, which was and has for many classes focused on the “IT Factor.” What is “IT” that I will need in order to be the type of turn around leader I want to be, the kind that can truly make a difference for students, the kind of change agent that everyone in this district and those involved in this program are hoping we will become? What is “IT” that is going to make me good enough to do this job? Today’s discussion of the characteristics of effective leaders and effective schools did not just focus on test scores, because assessments are only a small piece of the total picture. To lead change in our schools it is going to take more than just improving scores. When I started in the PROPEL program I knew what I wanted to do, I just had no clue how to go about doing it. The farther I get, the more I learn, and the more tools I add to the box, the more I realize that the “IT Factor” is not just about having tools and knowing what to do with them, it is going to take more than that. To become a change agent, it will require all those other things that did not fall into Domain 2, those “soft skills,” the ability to relate to others, commitment, desire, steadfast determination, and courage. I believe that the Marines have a good idea of what the “IT Factor” may be,  “When other principles are tested, it’s courage that prevents them from crumbling. It isn’t ignoring fear, but being stronger than fear. Courage is the guardian of all other values. It is there when times are toughest, when difficult decisions have to be made. It takes the form of mental, physical and ethical strength, and it is found in the backbone of every Marine” (Marines.com). After today, I truly believe that PROPEL is training us to be the Marines of Education, Semper Fi and lead on sergeant I have much to learn!

Dedicated to the men and woman of the Marines and PROPEL Cohort 2